On Friendships and Submarines.

Recent days I've been thinking about friendship, what it means to be a friend, what it means to be a non-friend and on the other end, an enemy.

Friends

Friends are people who help you succeed. It comes in different forms. Some friends give you hope, some make you feel that "yes, you can do this!", some bandage your wounds and patch you up, some open up ways for you, perhaps even teach you skills, or stop you from doing things to yourself despite how good you say it feels. Friends argue, friends love, friends give, take, defend, support, advise - friends are sugar and spice, supposedly. 

Friends help you succeed. 

Non-Friends

Non-friends are simply people who hadn't been through the proverbial war with you.

Some haven't the chance yet to, some simply refuse to. Either way, it is good enough indication to decide who is who in your life and how you would contribute to these relationships.

These people usually don't get into arguments with you, and if they did you can expect to see very much less of them because suddenly you're not worth the effort. 

It is important to know though, that these are the neutral people who can go either this way or that, and that is its own brand of exciting. Most tend to be civil, thank heavens, because people tend to be good people who like getting along with others - or they could go the other way and behave like an enemy, which brings me to the next category.

Enemies

Commonly, these are the people whose goals are going directly against yours (impersonal enemies) and those whose ideal situation is to see you ruined (personal!). Their goals say nothing about their quality of being - think being the enemy of Superman vs being the enemy of say, Batman.

I've come to understand however, that there is the accidental enemy. I'd like to think that every one of my enemies are accidental enemies... It makes things easier to forgive.

...

Definitely, friendships need maintaining or they become submarines. For those who have felt the pain of submarining... Hugs. Sometimes people move into their own paths in the next chapters of their lives where it is hard for you to follow. Sometimes it is you who move into those chapters. Whichever it is, be glad I pray, for the growth and joy you have shared when you could. 

It gets better from here.