Choices, and Paths, 1 of 2

Sometimes, when you see your friends post things on facebook, do you sometimes feel a twinge of jealousy, envy?

I did, today. My gorgeous friend, Kyla Tan, is taking part in Asia's Next Top Model. Her beautiful features were on the screen, and I felt a pinch of jealousy. She and I were in the same beauty pageant, that's how we started. Miss Sweetheart 2007, I still recall. Contrary to what the papers wrote, she was a star before anyone knew she would be one - and now the self is showing itself true.

(Well done, Kyla, know that Loren Xue is proud of your representing Singapore.)

She always had ambition, something I rather like in a person.


But I digress. So I felt the pinch of envy, and wondered what if - what if, I did not head to Australia, to pursue a new life? What if I stayed, and pursued modelling and acting instead? Would I have starved?

...no, never. I would never have allowed that.


Between delving in a career that requires me to be popular and loved to get the income in - and one that deals directly with money - I would sooner choose money.

Reason? Beauty fades in the most disappointing of ways, while money compounds.

Before you dismiss me as a money-lovin' hoe, wait. I may be, but you can decide proper at the end of this post. Deal? Deal.

So.

Both money and beauty are, at its core, vanities. One is physical charisma and the other, currency - the former buys you attention and the other buys you convenience and sometimes when it gets ugly, relations.


Of course, convenience comes in many other forms, but mainly: intellect (knowing how to make things), wisdom (knowing when to utilise the made things), charisma (beauty and/or ability to get people to work them things) - but still these remain personal qualities and are thus un-transactable, other than by means of employment or contract. If that were to happen, then the fortunate (or unfortunate) convenience to acquire these would commonly be money.

Again, there are other ways to get acquire these conveniences. One can use favours (sexual or quid-pro-quos), or strategic positions in exchange in situations where money may be useless or meaningless, as may be the case be when stakes are high and/or varied. But a person usually has only two or three out of four conveniences at his disposal - intellect, wisdom, beauty, money.

It is when there is a convenience seemingly lacking that the people strive. For more, more. Then the issue of self-security and self-awareness come in, but that's another story for another time.


Assuming all things are equal (here's where I start taking liberties): if one's lack in physical beauty is made up for in personal charisma - which is to say that one person is technically as Charismatic as the other - and Intellect and Wisdom can be mitigated by Blind Luck and/or Family Relations, then the final area of lack  (perceived and otherwise) will be in Wealth.

And I choose Wealth, because I know I can. Because I don't have anything better to aim for yet, other than self-validification and actualisation. For without the need, work is unnecessary. When work is unnecessary there is no growth (because truly, humans are lazy) and when there is no growth how will anyone fulfill the potential to become the best version of himself?

Even butterflies need to squeeze themselves out of their cocoons.


There's only one thing I can think of that mitigates all of these conveniences and renders each one of them meaningless*... but the post has already gotten too long.

Stay tuned for the sequel.

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*I said "meaningless", I didn't say it's unnecessary.