Friendships.

My father, in one of his several moments of seriousness, told me, "在家靠父母，出外靠朋友" - which translated means, "you rely on your parents when you're at home, and you rely on your friends when you're outside of home." It was common for young men to leave home at about sixteen or so in Ancient China, and journey to pursue studies, or to find a better way of life.

Sometimes it's years before said son returns, assuming he does not get killed in then-barbaric China, or that the parents survive the winters and live long enough to see his return. But the son will always return sometimes with a bride and family, even if it were to graves.


But we're not talking about that. We're talking about friendships.

I've had the dubious honour of seeing different levels and types of people doing vastly different things very early in this life, and it's come to shape my perception and friendships.

When my father told me that adage, I disliked it. Maybe because I strongly disliked him then, and had no respect for him. It seemed that the adage advocates reliance on one's parents and using one's friends for gain. What manner of friendship and child-hood (meant like knighthood, queenship) is this, that we are to use the people we meet?

I scoffed at the very idea.


I learnt very early on that money, power, are things that make people stick to you like flies to honey - and despite its glittery goodness, is practically dust if you haven't a solid inside.

Money. It buys things. If people can be bought, then these buyable people are also things. It (money) shouldn't impress you neither because money by and in itself is a convenience. It is sometimes indicative of some manner of personal superiority, be it intellectual, circumstantial, material - but an asshole's an asshole. Like a spade is a spade.

He can wear the most beautiful silken threads and drive the latest Bat Mobile - but he'd have to pay me to live with him if he's an asshole. Anyone who's got it knows that: if you have to pay for love and affection - invaluable, by right - then it's no good*. Likewise loyalty, likewise friendship.


Like there are assholes in the world, there are morons. There are bitches, there are hoes, there are... so many, many types of people. But I'd have them as a friend, because we may have been there too, once upon a time in a galaxy far far away. As long as they do their best to hold themselves together, and try not to detonate at me, or do anything to my physical body. I'll try not to hold it against them.

But maybe briefly, if they're hot.

AHEM


Of course, like you there are types people I gravitate toward; I too have my favourite types. They are the people who are happy. They are those who laugh and smile, who are healthy, open, aren't grouchy or moody - genuine, happy to oblige like I'm usually happy to oblige - never mind if they're on the quieter spectrum. These people almost always have a sort of a spark, that twinkle in their being. They can be calmer and quieter in personality, but there is always that zing in their presence. That spark.

I call it joy. Joie de vivre. It's delightful when a bunch of these people come together and have a ball. Even if there's only one of these in a gathering. It's almost like how the bible says in Acts 16:31: "Believe in the Lord Jesus, and you shall be saved, you and your household." 

Except we're all saved, and this delicious joy is amplified by each of us, in the gatherings that are the households.

Conversely, moody-grouchy types make the seconds a little longer, and I age a little faster.


Thus I pray, that you too already have that spark within yourself. Because it's rather rude to go out and age people. Verily#.

If you haven't yet, I pray you will have it, soon. In the Name of Jesus. Amen. ^_^




---

*Some would say that they may not even consider accepting the money to live with an asshole, some may even cite Proverbs 21:9 - "Better to live on a corner of the roof than share a house with a quarrelsome wife." but I say accept, especially if it's for a very short period of time. You'll be so thankful to be out of there at the end of it.

But seriously, if they would condescend the value of something invaluable and priceless, then it's just desserts that they get it: beautiful gold-diggers. Beautiful, but gold-diggers. If anything should impress you, I pray that it is the person, not things.


#But let's discuss the terms of a contract if I suddenly own a beauty parlour. Go forth and cause dermatological cataclysm. Here are some vouchers, termsandconditionsapply.